At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
