I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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