he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
