She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
