The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
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