Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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