i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
