ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize
