i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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