i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize