dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Randomize