wat bout pragnant strippers??
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
