I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize