We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
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THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
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Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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