How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
