hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize