Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize