She is in my trunk
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
