im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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