have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
So many bounce houses so little time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize