i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize