and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize
