Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize
