yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
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Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
He better not be in your backpack
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
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The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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