good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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