Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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