Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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