just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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