Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize