What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
In other news, I just burned my penis
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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