I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I'm both gender and math confused
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