tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
