take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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