So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
P.S. I can't hear my feet
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
