Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
