I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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