so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
