Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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