I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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