U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
