you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize