Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I am one with the molecules
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
