I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
