are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize