He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
