My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
