Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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