I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
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