woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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