We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize